Wednesday, 28 May 2008

No artsy fartsy shite but thouroughly tired of it all!!!

Goddess! Over 6 Months now and I just cannot get my fat arse up to do some nice 3D work.
I have no Ideas.
Actually it all started with me buying my fat, new Laptop at the end of October 2007. I 'gave' it to myself as a belated birthday present. Btw, how pathetic is that!? I got 25 that Month, shouldn't a gorgeous, sweet looking bloke buy me something expensive instead??? Like a bling-bling or a Mustang. Ok, let's stop dreaming! -Though it is a good question if I may say so.

So I bought it and after installing Bryce, Poser, Cinema 4D plus süper-nice rendererrereererer....... Vray, I started playing around and made a few pieces, did some fractals just for the fun of it, too, and then in December... BAM!!!ONE1!!
I just got left behind by my Muse!

I don't know what to do, I am playing around again with html, css and try out vector graphics but nothing with substance, nothing that I would really complete!
And even worse, I just surf around on the net while my little iMac is sleeping on the Desk in my bedroom. I hate Microsoft, yet I also hate Steve.
If only Apple was the way like before I would have bought an Apple Laptop or none at all. The digital World is fucking evil!

On another note my Coccyx still hurts like hell, for over 5 Month now, and though my Doc told me at the beginning of this Month to go visit a Radiologist I am so terribly scared that I haven't brought up the courage to actually do right that! You know... visit him!

And my back hurts because of my boobs, God how I wish I had smaller ones. My back and neck are so fucking killing me right now, yet I don't feel the pain so much 'cause the pain at the tail-bone swallows all other in their quantity and noticeability.

Dear Lord, while writing all this I took a look out of the window and saw a neighbour running around with a jacket, is the woman daft? It's sweating 26°C or so in the shadow.
I am sweating, and I am by no means a person who normally sweats from sitting around doing nothing!

I was going to write so much more meaningless shite but I am too tired right now. Bye!

P.S.: Doh, how much of an idiot can you be. I was going to link whoever is stupid enough to read this load of *** to a new set of PS CS Action, called Slight Enhancement II!

So feel free to download, use as you need and credit, 'cause crediting = Love!

Slight Enhancement II
by ~PinkPanthress-Stock on deviantART

P.P.S.: Ooh, and 4 weeks no meat eating!!!

Thursday, 15 May 2008

Omigad!1ONE! I am melting & some veg-veg! <_<

Just a small update 'cause I am bored like hell... *goodness*
I talk too much Denglish these Days, everything sounds so cheap and germanized when I write English! D:

So we're having summer weather since the end of April, but from the 06'th of May on we are having a mega orgiastic, Super-heat-wave where the thermometer shows no less than 26°C in the shadows, or whatever you call it in English... and I am melting! :,(
Which means as well I still wasn't in Cologne, getting my nose-piercing! DX

Also I try to not go to the Radiologist, I am far too scared of the outcome!

Ooh, and... I am a vegie-thingy-terian for over two weeks now!
Yeah, also beans and onions are a big NO from now on! D: Which makes me wonder, what can I eat after all!?! I have difficulties with almost everything edible in this World!

I'm out! *el burpo*

Monday, 12 May 2008

Sometimes less Action is much more pleasing to the Eye!

I thought I should give away a few of my personal Actions on Photoshop. I have a few I use a lot to enhance my personal Photos slightly, the first Pack that you can Download contains the first 3 of mine.
If it gets downloaded more than say 25 times or so I'll give away a few more. ^_^;

Slight Enhancement
by ~PinkPanthress-Stock on deviantART

Saturday, 10 May 2008

Doc appointment, bad news and good news!

So my Coccyx is causing me pain for a little over 3 Month. On Monday the pain was so dire I had to cancel an important meeting with someone. But when I made a phone call on Thursday for an appointment at my Doc, turned out I had to go on Friday instead... :/

When I got there I told him about the Pain and he gave me an interview about my health in the Past. Well, turned out with my bilateral dysplasia, its subluxation and the two following surgeries when I was a Child takes its toll. I bloody knew it!!! I fucking hate Doctors!
He asked me if I already had given birth to a Child because the hips widening and all that shite, which of course I haven't, and if my hips themselves still hurt, which they do for about 15 years now but whatever, then he did 'put' me on a Scale to weigh me, turns out I lost between 4,5 to 6 kilograms in the past 5 Month! Yay!!!

He wants me to go to a Radiologist in our Town so they can take a 'shot' of my hips, the coccyx and my spine ...déjà vu very much?!

'kay, though I feel very close to cry and am terribly scared... I won't Panic! :(

I mean, last Time I would tell my Doctor that my Hips/Bones did hurt they told me I was a Hypochondriac and to lazy to do Sport in Elementary School, I was 9 and it would take 2 more Years of pain and walking in agony, a sharp sting in my hips with every step I did take, until they would do an emergency surgery when I was and ruin the rest of my Life at an early Stage!
So what should I think of it??? Everything repeating itself?
Or did I get Paranoid with Time!? - Not likely!!!

So this means... I lost weight! But I am having problems with my health again! Well, the pain never stooped, still now it is worse than before!

Good night!!!

Thursday, 8 May 2008

Ruined nose-thingy and bad language ahead!

Sorry for my foul mouth, but...

What the hell is wrong with those idiot People around me??? -I was barely out of my standard late morning Douche, getting ready for a Brunch when the younger of my two older Brother stuck his fucking Nose in my Nose-Piercing thingy, getting all fucked up about issue of the Studio I had chosen and wanted the job to be done and all.

I mean, wtf??? Banging a 18 year old doesn't make you wiser right??? Who the fuck does he thingk he is?
I have gone thrugh a fucking lot more in my Life than he did, and still he goes on my nerves about Hygiene and yadda, yadda...
One of the hygenic centered Stories contained an Ash-Tray and Needles, really I mean, I haven't even seen any Cigarettes in the whole Place.
I fucking don't care if his catholic child Girlfriend is getting all prissy about someone getting something he or she is too scared about. Or whatever the fuck is wrong with him. Maybe he's got blue Balls.

God, and that makes me think of her again... she is officially 18 of Years, but mind wise she is no older than say 12 or so! And her laugh, oh by all that is holy, it scares me more than any Romero Zombie or Argento Demon Movie. D:
Oh, and there's the fact that he is 13 Years older than her! *frustrated*
I feel so ashamed!!!

And the damage their Relationship is causing our Family-Name, fuck my Nose-Piercing cannot be comparable to that! Ever!
She is so immature, and if she would at least look hot, I could just go on and not mind since she would look gorgeous, but no I cannot even brag on about a great looking Girlfriend on my Brother's side.

So I'll go on next Tuesday to another Piercing Studio in Cologne. But God help me if I won't hit my brother's ugly Face if he stucks his stinking nose and shitty chin in my private business again.

To recite his 'best' (add a huge drop of sarcasm here) Quote of today.
"Anyways, I thought you weren't into these kind of things. I mean, a Nose-Piercing?" *lulz*

Yeah, immature isn't it, dear Brother? -Just like your behaviour and your recent, fugly Girlfriend.

I swear, right now I would love to fucking punch a whole in his Face!
Man, People are dying out of hunger in this World, yet my Family and other Acquaintances of mine get all worked up about me wanting a shitty Nose-Piercing and a Tattoo!

I am tired and must go to sleep, night!

Tuesday, 6 May 2008

One more Day!

So we went to town today,that is, me and my mom. After searching the Tattoo&Piercing Studio for an whole hour, we found it in a side-alley. I asked the owner, a nice woman, about prices and methods to get a nice nose-piercing.
There is this one with that cow-marking machine, right? This one is, I guess, called the gun method where your nostril gets punched by a dull stud-piercing. It costs only 15€ which makes about $23,35 in the US and Canada...
And then there's this european Canula method, where you have the sharp needle and the plastic thingy, it costs 49€ which makes about $76,25 in the US and Canada...
I know the second method is a bit expensive but I think I should take it rather than the gun-method.
'Cause the Canula will be sharp and that should give a nicer, more non-painful Result.
So, yeah Goodbye 49€, god what I could have bought with all that Money! XD

My mother went crazy and is miffed right now, telling me it was wrong and all. I asked her to please take a look at my age for one, and then also think about the old Turks before they were converted to Islam, they had also nose-piercings, so what???

Then I told her that I was going to get myself a Tattoo next Month, and she almost fainted then and there in front of the shop.
Boy I think she'll have a coronary when I tell her about my hair. :3

Now it's after midnight and I have given out a round of soft ice to my family, yeah I know I am being generous today... and sit here on the Balcony with my Laptop. It's beautifully cold after a really, really hot Day. :D ..and I am feeling fine!

Monday, 5 May 2008

5'th day Veggie, Nose-Piercing and Criticism via Fandom!

So, yeah I know it sounds boring by now, but 5 Days of Vegetarianism and I am about to crawl up the Walls. I never thought about it that much but meat is or rather was a huge part of my Life, so it's kind of hard to not eat it, yet I haven't eaten any. :D

What shocked me most was my mother Yesterday, while eating some Salad for Dinner with my Father we were discussing Dinner for Tuesday, she did say she was going to make some nice Sarma, then looking at me for a few secs she asked if I would eat Sarma without the minced meat, just rice as filling. I really didn't know what to say! She is when it comes to meat and food a hardcore Muslim, so she thinks it is a sin to not eat meat... since the helal/kosher animal, given by God to you, would die without any use or purpose if you didn't eat them.
Whatever, I just said yes and was very happy about her thoughtfulness. ^^;

I am thinking about getting myself a Nose-Piercing tomorrow. I wanted one since I was 13 or so, and now that I am working as my own Boss I think it would be okay, since I cannot fire myself for Tattoos or Piercings. XD
So, yeah seems like I will through 50€ to the wind for a Piercing in my right Nostril tomorrow!
And a Tattoo is on its way next Month!!!

Now onto something absolutely different! So I manipulated an Actors face, trying just to make him look younger and such, went to his fan forum and posted the darn piece 10 Days ago in before-after fashion, and fuck it, today I had like 40 clicks on the thread and yet no one has given me any constructive criticism. Hell, I would even be happy if they did tell me it looks like shite.
Scheisse nochmal!!! Teufel, Tot und Teufel!

I'll wait another 4 Days, then I'll close the thread. I mean, it's not as if I cannot cope with negative crits, but I didn't even get that, so what should I make of that! :'( I am truly and terribly miffed!
Though... the guys on that forum are very nice, so I guess it must be my fault!

Saturday, 3 May 2008

Inkscape brushes, 3'rd Day of Veggie-thingy and so on!

Ok, so this is the third Day of my new eating habits and I can already feel my restraints crumble. Oh Lord give me strength!!! XD

And I've got very bad pain inside due to my reflux these Days. Bleh!!!

While definitely not thinking of lovely Cows swallowed/devoured whole and alive, I did try myself slowly at the first few vector exercises. But since I digress easily it ended in tribal, vector brushes for Photoshop. *doh*

Here they are for everyone stopping by!

Inked Scape
by ~PinkPanthress-Stock on deviantART

Thursday, 1 May 2008

1'st Day of my personal veggie-tart-ianism!

Oh my God, so it seems I really did start my new 'life-style'...
As of today I am a mixture of a Lacto-Ovo-Vegeterian and somewhat of a Pollo-Vegetarian. Minus the Chicken, 'cause my stomach is rebelling for a bout 1 & 1/2 Year if I try to eat it, so there is only Poultry left in form of Turkey for me, which I will try to eat only once every two weeks or less if possible.
Let's see how that all will interfere with my chronic Anaemia & Iron deficiency anemia.

And today they all made fun of me when I told my Family! XD I am okay with that though!

I won't stop eating meat because of animal rights or the thought it is cruel to let them be 'slaughtered' so I can eat them. No, I love meat but my body is behaving quite funny these past Years besides I want to loose some weight and I want to live healthier. It is part of my Plan on living healthier, which I am working on for many Years now.
I stopped smoking almost 8 Years ago over night, and a few Month later stopped drinking Alcohol. Though the hardest thing I have ever drunk was Champagne and Wine, but still.... :)

And I know already how much I will miss eating minced cow-meat raw and fresh!!! *cries*

Today I ate over the whole Day only bread, rice, mushrooms, onions, cheese, sojola and Harzer cheese,! ....with no meat, no cold cut, no turkish sücük! :( I really need some time to get used to this, and still do not like the thought!

P.S.: If anyone reads this, the next Post will include some new, nifty, useful PS CS brushes again, I am already working on them!

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